No Place Like Home

Random musings on adoption, recovery, and life on life's terms. Enjoy!

Friday, June 30, 2006

Expectations

I posted this on a thread and wanted to transfer it over here to my blog because it's so applicable to where I am today and I want to be reminded of this everyday.

"Expectations are premeditated resentments. When I set myself up with certain expectation of anothers behavior then I'm opening the door for resentment.

In my own situation I'm literally weeks away from possibly meeting my first born. I'm definately meeting his parents and he may choose to come as well. My natural instinct is to assume that I'm not worthy (or up to par) with these people. They were the ones who were capable to parent at a time i was not. That's a really sucky feeling to have.

But the part of me that feels that way is the old me, and I don't have to listen to that voice anymore. All I have to do is be myself and trust in the God of my understandig to work things out the way they are suppose to happen. I have no idea what the outcome may be, and honestly in the grand scheme of things it's none of my business.

I believe in a higher purpose and plan. If I am meant for some type of relationship with these people then it will develop naturally with no effort on my part. Just being me is enough. By eliminating the expectations of myself AND of them I open myself up to a greater purpose. And maybe that purpose won't be revealed until years down the road, but it is enough for me to know that there is a purpose.

I'm grateful that today I am willing to open myself up to the possibilities of life. Sometimes that means getting hurt, but even the hurts can be needed lessons if I'm willing to look for the higher purpose in them.

I believe for me, keeping my expectations low is part of setting healthy boundaries. "

4 Comments:

Blogger kim.kim said...

Low expectations is a good attitude to have with reunion, when my expectations are too high I often get disappointed.

Reunion for me has been an emotional journey, parts of it very painful but my life has literally blossomed since I was back in contact with my now adult child.
I keep peeking over at your blog now to see how you are doing.

2:42 PM  
Blogger Joy said...

Well it's July!!!
Any words yet?

I have a feeling this is going to be a wonderful experience for you.

I certainly hope so.

Warmly,
joy

8:55 AM  
Blogger Heather said...

Hey Joy.....:-0)

No word yet, still waiting to hear back from them. I gave his mom my phone number so we could chat about the details beforehand, still waiting to hear fom her so we'll see.

Thanks for the well wishes, I'm getting excited the closer it gets to the 21st!

Heather

1:05 PM  
Blogger Heather said...

Thanks for checking out my blog Kim!

Heather

1:06 PM  

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